You're Not From Here
by lilypad
Summary: *Pirates of The Caribbean* Jack Sparrow on one of his many trips. Jack acts drunk, Anna Maria doesn't eat dinner, they hear voices...well, songs. It's a slight parody. Just read! And review!


Hey you guys….I know, I know…I'm starting another fic…but this one's just a short one-timer…it's a songfic…hope you guys enjoy since this is my first Pirates of the Caribbean fic…the movie was sooooo awesome!  I loved it!  It was the best movie ever!!!!!!!!!!!!

Disclaimer: PotC doesn't belong to me…Johnny Depp doesn't belong to me (however much I wish him to be…L)  Anna Maria doesn't belong to me…the song is "You're Not From Here" by Lara Fabian…the only thing that DOES belong to me is the plot…sorta…so don't sue me or anything cuz the only thing you MIGHT get is my grad dress and you can have it for free cuz I'm not a dress person…enough ranting, on with the story!

****

**You're Not From Here**

By: lilypad 

Anna Maria was fuming.  How dare he?!  Jack Sparrow had to be the most aggravating man that ever sailed the seven seas!  Well, he'd probably discovered that there are more than just seven seas.  Darn him!  Why'd he have to be such a great pirate?  She wouldn't feel so obliged to listen to him if he were an only **adequate** pirate…but **no**!  He just **had** to be Mr. High-and-Mighty-Pirate.  And he just **had** to fit the profile for a "tall, dark, and dangerous" man.  She was stuck.  On one hand, she **absolutely** admired him, even **liked **him!  On the other hand, he was an insufferable prick!  The problem was that he seemed to think of her as "tall, dark and dangerous" too because he'd been acting more drunk than usual around her.

"Anna!  Lass, when **did** all of these women star' to **love** slappin' me?  Your slap was probabl' the fifteenth slap I've received in the pas' week.  Bloody 'ell!  What is it with ye women and slappin'?!" Jack Sparrow drawled in his slight British accent.

Anna whirled around and slapped him as hard as she could, and then stood there, watching amusedly as he collected himself.

"What was **tha'** one fo'?!" He grumbled.

"What was that?" Anna smirked and raised her hand for a second go.

"Nothin'.  Nothin' 't all.  Say, do ye wanna have dinner with me tonigh'?  In me cabin?  Jus' the two o' us?" Jack moved his eyebrows up and down suggestively.

She looked Jack over, and said a resigned, "Aye."  Jack beamed and started muttering to himself.  "Well, I'll 'ave to try an' cook somethin' nice.  Anna, how do ye feel 'bout shrimp.  I can cook a **mean** shrimp.  Wha' do ye think?"

"Shrimp sounds fine, Sparrow." Anna turned away and sighed.

"Alrigh' I'll see you later…could you maybe take control over the steerin' thingy for a li'l while?  I have ta take care o' some things."

"You mean take over Captain for a while?  Sure.  I'd love to." Anna smiled and set off for the bow.  She looked around, closed her eyes, and thought to herself, _Stupid!  Why would you agree to dinner with Sparrow?  You know what he's like!  I'll have to be careful!  **But he's so handsome.  How can I think straight?**_  She was disgusted with herself, so she took control of the ship.

~~*~*~~

Jack smirked to himself.  She had agreed to dinner.  Oh, how happy he was.  He could dance a jig!  In fact, he already had!  He'd sung "Yo Ho, A Pirates Life For Me" and danced around his cabin, knocking over a table and a lamp in the process.  It had taken him two hours to fix the table and lamp, but it was worth it in his eyes.

He looked at the time-teller and gave a strangled gasp.  He only had eight hours to cook dinner.  Knowing him, he'd need at least 6 tries to get it right.  He sprang up, knocking an ink bottle down, swore out loud, making all of his crew stare at his cabin door, and then ran out of his chamber and into the kitchens.  He asked Slim if he knew how to make shrimp as he was attempting to jump over the counter.  He managed to knock over three jars with spices over and overturn a pot of boiling chili, at which Slim growled and grabbed Jack, trying to pull him over quicker.  Jack straightened himself up, and tried to right his hair and bandanna while Slim cleaned up the chili and the spices.

When Slim was done, Jack pounced on him, interrogating him as to whether or not he knew how to make shrimp.  Poor Slim backed away until ha was against the wall with Jack staring at him out of his brown, slightly mad, eyes.  He found himself nodding, and then embraced by Jack.  Finally, Jack dragged him around the kitchen, all the while singing a very sappy, soft song.

Slim extricated himself from Jack and looked at him rather warily.

"Alrigh' Slim, ol' pal.  I need you to  teach me how to fix up the best batch o' shrimp o' me life!  Can ye do that fo' me?" Jack bounced excitedly on the balls of his feet.  When Slim nodded quickly, Jack gave a whoop of joy and bounced out of the kitchen.

"Cap'n!  Ye need to be in th' kitchen fo' the teachin' to begin!" Slim called after him.

Jack stuck his head in and grinned, showing all of his gold teeth.  "I kno' tha' mate!  I'm just goin' to take a lap of the ship.  I nee' t' work off all this extra energy!  I'll be righ' back…" And he ran off again.

Slim sighed and began taking out ingredients, like shrimp, spices, veggies, and the like.  When Jack returned, Slim took a deep breath and began.  "Well, firs' of all, ye nee' t' wash all o' the veggies…"

~~*~*~~

Three hours later, Jack had managed to make a batch of deep fried shrimp.  They weren't originally going to be deep-fried, but Jack accidentally knocked half the shrimp into the deep fryer and Slim had said that they go with that instead of starting again.  The shrimp were looking unusually black, so Jack was going to try again.

"Slim!  Ye have t' stay an' watch over me…what if somethin' goes terribly wron'?  How woul' ye feel abou' tha'?" Jack smirked at Slim's worried expression.  Little did he know that the worried expression was for what Jack would do to his kitchen rather than what happened to him.

So, with Slim watching over him, Jack began again.  This time, he did it by himself, but he was extra careful.  It took him about three and a half hours to finish, but he finally did and they looked great.

Jack smiled, very pleased with himself indeed.  He had done it!  He'd **made** his own **dinner**!  Anna had better appreciate it!  Because if she didn't!  Jack shook his fist up at the sky.

Slim watched him, apprehension written all over his face.  Jack had his back to him, and all he had seen was Jack shake his fist at the ceiling.  Maybe he **was** a bit off his rocker…maybe the heat really **had** gotten to him!  Slim backed quietly out of the kitchen.

When Jack turned back around to thank Slim, he found that he was alone in the kitchen.  He mumbled about how people heed to learn to be more polite, and headed back to his cabin after putting the shrimp away from prying eyes and hands.  "And mouths." Jack said out loud.

~~*~*~~

Anna watched as Jack Sparrow approached her.  She sighed and turned the steering over to him.  He smiled at her suggestively as he took control again.  She grumbled about how all pirate men are pigs and he put a hand over his heart.

"Ye wound me, Anna!  I'm no pig!" Jack said, dramatically.

"Oh, put a sock in it, Sparrow!  I know what you're like!  Did you manage to burn a few tries before you got the shrimp right?" Anna said sarcastically.

Jack forced a smile and said, "O' course.  For your information, yours truly managed to deep-fry shrimp before actually cookin' it!"

Anna laughed, and then gave a snort.  Jack stared at her and then thought, _Now **this** is my kind of gal!_

_"_Sparrow, you're one-of-a-kind!  Are you sure you're from here?" Anna declared, all the while trying to stop her laughing.

Jack smiled.  So, she thought that highly of him?  Well, he thought that highly of her too.  He'd just wait and see what happens tonight.

Anna was thinking along the same lines.  She smirked to herself, and walked away, calling, "See ye tonight, aye?"

Jack shouted back, "Aye!  And you'd better be hungry, ye should!"

~~*~*~~

Anna surveyed herself in her mirror.  She was wearing her finest, cream trousers that were slightly ripped at the knees, and a loose, dirty, white blouse that men usually wore.  She smiled at her reflection and casually strolled out of her cabin.

When she was within 15 feet of Jack's lodgings, she could hear him belting out the words for "Yo Ho, A Pirates Life For Me".  She laughed, snorted and walked on.  When she was within five feet of his cabin, she started to smell something really appetizing.  Anna sorted to herself and leisurely walked in on Jack changing his shirt.****

He turned around and look shocked for a moment.  Then, his face broke into a grin and he teased, "Anna.  If you were **that** eager, we could just skip dinner!"

Anna blushed and turned around, waiting for Jack to put his shirt on.  He had quite a nice chest, very muscled and hard.  She jumped when he put a hand on her arm and turned her around.  She froze when she heard soft music start playing.  Jack seemed not to hear it, but she thought that he was faking.

She heard the words and stared at Jack.

*~*I don't know what is going on   
You turn around and touch my heart   
A silent moment speaks the truth *~*  
  


"Wha'?  Wha' is 't Anna?" Jack asked, breaking her out of her reverie.  She jumped and looked around.  "Anna?  Are ye alrigh'?"

"Shhh!  Sparrow!  Can't you hear it?  It just said that "A silent moment speaks the truth" so be quiet!  I wanna hear the truth!" Anna hissed.  Then, she saw Jack in a whole new light, the moonlight.  It illuminated his strong chin, and his braided beard.  She suddenly realized that he was quite handsome.  Jack reached forward but Anna slapped his hand away and growled, "Sparrow!  Shut up!  I wanna hear the truth!"

Jack started.  He suddenly heard music.  By the looks of it, Anna had stopped hearing it.  She was looking around, desperately trying to find 'the truth in silence'.  

*~*Something has happened all at once   
It should have scared me in advance   
But I was falling in those eyes of yours   
And so fear was gone   
I know there was nothing else I'd ever want *~*

He looked around, trying to figure out if he was going mad.  Then, he stopped and listened to the words.  Jack lifted his head and stared right into Anna's eyes.  Apparently, he was supposed to be falling into them, but he could still feel the solid deck beneath his feet.  Oh!  Maybe it was spiritual.  Maybe he was supposed to be falling spiritually.  He thought about this, and shook his head, breaking contact with Anna's eyes.

Then, he stared at her.  She was bathed in moonlight.  _Thank Black Beard that she's not one of Barbossa's goons!  __She's__ not a skeleton in the moonlight.  _He took a deep breath at the thought and suddenly thought about something.  What if she were one of Barbossa's crew?  Would he still feel the same about her?  Nah!  He was thankful that she wasn't one of 'them'.  Then, the music suddenly stopped.

Anna looked up when she heard the music start again.

~*~I know you   
You're not from here   
I've waited for you to appear   
To take my breath away   
And make me weep   
You're not from here   
Not from this here and now   
Just a touch of yours   
And I fly... and I fly... and I fly... ~*~  
  


She looked at Jack.  Where was she supposed to fly?  Was that the song's way of telling her to get away; fly away?  And hadn't she just said to Jack earlier that she didn't think that he was from here?  This song was quoting her!  She looked around as the song stopped and thought about the words.

It was true.  She knew Jack, and she knew he wasn't from here.  He was from Tortuga, but had she really waited for him to appear?  She hadn't been to happy when he had appeared.  He'd stolen her boat.  She hadn't lost her breath when he appeared.  Well, she had, but only because she was screaming after him to bring her boat back…and she had wept…but only for her lost boat.

Jack did bring a touch of "his" into "this here and now"…but what was this nonsense about flying?  Human's couldn't fly!

"Anna.  D'you hear the music?" Jack asked warily.

She shook her head at him, and he inclined his head towards where the music was coming from for him.

~*~I can't get used to missing you   
If this is how it's gotta be   
I need an angel to watch over me   
No one can hold the hands of time   
But I can hold you in my mind   
Over and over like a melody ~*~  
  


He had missed her when he had taken her boat, but he'd gotten over it.  When he saw her again with the rest of his crew however, he knew that that was how it was supposed to be; the two of the close by.  That had been why he had asked her here tonight.  That, and possibly because he found her attractive.

No matter how attractive she was though, she was no angel.  And what was all this hooey about someone holding the 'hands of time'?  That was impossible.  Unless they were magic, and witches and wizards were hung!  Weren't they?  Oh well…who cared?!  Then he thought about 'holding her in his mind'.  What did that mean?  Certainly, he thought about her, but what else?  He didn't think of her like a melody!  What was all this confusing garbage?  Was this song helping him or trying to make him mad?!  He thought about it   Maybe it meant that he thought of her continuously like a melody/song repeats itself over and over again.  This 'conscience song' was making matters worse!

Anna started to look around, as if she had just started hearing the song.

"Anna, luv.  D'you hear 't now?" Jack questioned.

She nodded and followed the sound.

~*~For now   
I'll stand still   
For now   
I'll be filled by the memory of your skin ~*~  
  


She frowned.  Well, she was standing still!  What next?  And what memory of his skin?  It wasn't like they had 'done it'.  The mere thought appalled her.  Although not as much as it should have.  She seemed disgusted with herself, and began trying desperately to wipe herself off, as if she was dirty.  Maybe the song meant that they should do 'it'.  Ugh!  What kind of advice was that?!  She'd do 'it' when she was right and ready, not when some song told her to!

"Wha's wrong, luv?" Jack asked quietly.

"N-nothing.  Just keep your 'skin' away!" Anna cried.

"Wha'?" He was confused.  Then he heard it again and he leaned towards it subconsciously.

~*~I know you   
You're not from here   
You don't belong to lies and tears   
The greatness of your soul   
Makes me weep   
You're not from here   
Not from this here and now   
Just a touch of yours   
And I fly... and I fly... and I fly... ~*~  
  


What?  What was the song talking about?  Who wasn't from 'this here and now'?  Surely it wasn't Anna.  She…she…wait!  He had it!  Maybe it meant that she was something otherworldly…like an angel.  What?!  Where had that come from?!  Well, she certainly was strong enough to be an angel.  And attractive enough.  But not kind enough.  That girl had a hit that would knock anyone off his or her high horse and she wasn't afraid to use it!

It was true, however, that she didn't 'belong to lies and tears'.  She was one of the most honest people he knew.  But what about 'the greatness of her soul'?  Did it 'make him weep'?  Certainly not!  Captain Jack Sparrow didn't weep for anyone or anything!  Finally, what was this about flying?  Where was he supposed to be flying?  Was he supposed to be flying to her?  Well, he'd probably knock her over if he were flying to her.  He didn't have the greatest control…let alone air navigation.  He'd probably get lost trying to fly form one end of the ship to another.

Then, he heard another verse, and, by the looks of it, so did Anna.  They both leaned in the same direction to catch the words.

~*~I know you   
You're not from here   
I've waited for you to appear   
To take my breath away   
And make me weep   
You're not from here   
Not from this here and now   
Just a touch of yours   
And I fly... and I fly... and I fly... ~*~

"Well…I've heard this one before." Anna said, out loud.

"I haven'.  Shhhh!  Maybe it's tryin' t' tell us somethin' by lettin' both o' us hear 't." Jack whispered, coming up behind Anna and leaning his head over her shoulder.

"Sparrow, get your 'skin' away from me before I'm forced to slap you again." Anna mumbled.

"Alrigh'.  Gettin' mighty touchy, if ye ask me." Jack grumbled as he moved away.

"You would be too, if ye'd heard what I'd heard!" Anna called after him.

"Wha' does 't mean when 't says, 'I've waited for ye to appear'?" Jack asked, curious.

"I think it means that you were waiting for someone like me to appear into your life." Anna answered smugly.

"Wha'?  I'd be mad to be waitin' fo' someone to slap me every chance she gets!" Jack exclaimed.

Anna fumed.  Was that all she did, then?  Well…"Hey Sparrow.  Is that all I'm good for?" Anna called before marching up to him and kissing him lightly, as she hadn't had much experience.

Jack grinned and laughed.  "Well, I could get used t' this…it's like getting' drunk, excep' better!" He smiled and wrapped his arms around her waist.

Anna smirked, and said, "Well, we wouldn't want you to not be drunk, now would we?  It wouldn't be you!"

"Aye.  Well, we'll see about that!" Jack leaned in.

"Sparrow, we didn't eat dinner.  After you spent all that time making it."  Anna Maria teased.

"Aye.  It'll keep.  Fo' now, I've got meself more importan' things to worry abou'." Jack smiled.

The rest, as they say, is history!

THE END!!!!!!

Hey you guys…I hope you enjoyed the fic.  It took my close to 3 hours to write it but only cuz I kept stopping to chat…lol…anyways…I saw the movie two days ago, and I'm sooo obsessed with Jack Sparrow!  I thought that he was hot…along with Orlando Bloom, so I decided to write a fic in which Jack gets the girl.  REVIEW!!!!  Please??? lol


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